June 26

Being a care giver , for me,up to now, has not been  much of  a physical job . Up to now, he has been mostly independent in his activities of daily living. What is hard is the emotional stress, and there is not much that I can do about that. My reaction to the stress happens. There is no text book, no breathing exercises,no yoga or meditation  that makes it go away, or get easier.I tell you this , and I am borrowing this line from a dear friend, not because I want sympathy, but I want , in my case, to clue  you in  to how it feels. Here are a few examples; I hear a thump and I run to check.I hear a house noise, and I think it is the sound of someone falling or hitting a wall.  I hear a cough and my stomach knots. How's the breathing, does it look like he is having shallow breathing as he sits reading. Let's check the oxygen level. He is drinking an extra glass of water, is that good, is it bad. He's in the bathroom longer , should I check? He didn't finish everything that I gave him at lunch. Is his appetite getting smaller. Is he eating less, or is just a day that he doesn't want everything that I gave him. This kind of stress  is harmful to your health. I read that on Google. Stress releases a hormone that encourages you to eat more. It's probably related to survival mode. I understand that one. I wait for that other shoe to drop. There is no way to avoid the thought. It's sitting right across from you. Be as prepared as you can. That is the only thing you can do. And take a deep breath, letting it out slowly. Remember, this blog entry is for informational reasons only, not sympathy . So I will go and breath. 

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04.07 | 08:10

I read the last page first too. It’s a family curse.

22.05 | 08:38

so glad youre here mom!

29.08 | 13:45

Don't quite know how this got to me but it was on the top line of my computer (not in email) But I really enjoyed it. I truly admire you.

31.07 | 07:02

Leona, do you have a date or a booked flight that you come back ?

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