ON THE BACK BURNER

I didn't do the back 40. My son did some of it and then got distracted. I decided to sweep his  work shop. It was full of saw dust and wood shavings. I can lift heavy rocks and move them. I can mow. I can weed wack. Sweeping hurts my back. Isn't that crazy.Must be the  lateral movement. So I started my painting project. I wanted to paint the bathroom. It is the original grayish that the whole " cabin" is finished in. I taped. I primed and I put on the first coat. The bathroom is small and between the sink ,the tub, the  wardrobe and the toilet, it was hardly room for me to put in a ladder and then do some squats as I did the very lower portion. Tomorrow or later today,I can do the second coat.I think that I will like it. Today was also yard sale day. We hit three and for a total of $8, I picked up some really cool things. Like a large pickle crock and 2 People magazines. I read the magazines sitting out on my deck. I didn't know anyone but Alex Baldwin. I'm going to have to get out more.

Venice 85 , Port Townsend 64.That's good because I get to do the back 40. And cooler is better. I am down to the last section of this wheat that I am weed wacking and then mowing. It looks really nice. We will leave the wheat grass down and throw on rye and clover seeds. The clover will come up with red flowers next spring and early summer. This year, it looked very attractive with the lower red clover and the tall stalks of what I call wheat. This morning I went to the local garden shop for a few more deer free plants. I was told that there are so many deer this year, that they are even eating things they would normally avoid. The deer , as I may have mentioned, are every where. In multiples. It's turning into a political issue and economics. There aren't many options.As it is, this is a city of fences. When I was traveling through Morocco, I took pictures of doors, here I take pictures of fences. Many of them are practical and works of art. My fences are utilitarian wire. Not attractive,  but the deers don't do more damage than they already have. It's too bad, I don't get excited any more when I see one or many more just walking around town.I use to think that they were so sweet.

I know that there are a many women who have always done for themselves. But there are things that I now do, that really, I would rather someone else do. Like pumping gas. I love the smell of gas,  but I would rather not have to get out of the car and fill my tank. I put it off as long as I can.I hate to deal with insurance, banks, credit cards. Do I stay loyal to all of these concerns. Do I make the right decision when and if I switch. And internet decisions. Do I keep my land phone, can I count on myself to keep my cell phone with me. I hate to go through the automatic car wash. I'm always afraid that I won't center the car and fall off the rack. What I don't mind is putting out the garbage,mowing lawns.. who ever they belong to, or walking a dog in the middle of the night. And it is not true that two can live as cheaply as one. One can not live cheaply at all.

This day sis not go as I had wanted it to. My original plan was to go to the water and spend the day, quietly, with my thoughts. I guess that life  takes precedent. Once again,  Noodle had a bad night. This time it started at 2:40 AM. The sedative did not work. He cried, he whimpered, he arched his back, he vomited. He was not happy. At 8:20AM, I was at a Vet that had been recommended. X-rays, urinalyses, a call from this new Vet to my Vet in Venice.  No conclusion. A tiny stone in his bladder,  But not enough to cause the symptoms. Conclusion: he may have passed the stone and the urinalyses lab will tell because crystals will show up. Meantime: pain meds and a  very expensive canned dog food that is low protein.  Noodle feels pretty good, I am relieved that we are at least going to have some good nights of solid sleep. As for my plans to spend the day thinking of my life with Bob, I do that every day anyway, so I will just continue doing that. Robert Burns said "the best laid plans of mice and men go astray." I guess he had my day in mind.

This is like a reality check. I have an explicit memory of today. I know that Bob was drifting in and out of sleep. He was not in any distress .I had wanted to ask, but didn't ,how it feels to be dying. Do you know that you are dying. Do you have any thoughts about it. Are you angry. Are you just waiting. what do you know???? But I didn't ask. I didn't want him to know that we were waiting for him to die. It takes a long time for your body to shut down. I went to sleep about 10:00. At 10:58 I heard a slight cough, nothing dramatic. Then Bob's life was over. I remember calling my Hospice nurse. She took over from there. I remember the undertaker coming and asking me to go in another room as they moved Bob to a gurney. I remember the American flag put on his coffin. That's when I knew it was over. I don't remember another thing after that. I still see that flag and the gurney. This is what I remember. 

Latest comments

06.06 | 13:55

🌞👋😊. Hope you get it Leona. I can see you moving there,you would be happy and content with your son 😊. At some point when your both ready.

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19.05 | 10:55

Good Morning Leona!
Your descriptions of our beautiful country are so vivid that we're all
sharing your wonderful adventure! Thanks Dude!🤗
Love from 724

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18.05 | 07:58

Isn’t Pearl Street Mall fun So full of different shops. Went to the synagogue last night.

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13.05 | 07:45

Good Morning Yew Tew❗️💁
Thinkinaboutcha both this morning as you head off on your
exciting adventure❗️🤗❤️❤️ God Bless❗️
Much Love, Kate

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